If Time Where Limited, What Would You Begin?

Kali, the fierce goddess of transformation, makes a striking appearance. Wearing a skull necklace, she represents ego, illusion, and false identities, teaching us that true liberation comes from letting go. Kali doesn't comfort us; she serves raw, unvarnished truth. Death, rather than being life's opposite, dances alongside it as part of its rhythm. In her wild grace, endings spark new beginnings, and destruction clears space for rebirth. She demands our honesty and readiness to awaken.

As my 52nd birthday approaches, I reflect on truth and authenticity. When I called friends to celebrate, I realized my dad would've had only three years left at this age. He passed away when I was 21, and that loss shaped my life. This unforeseen absence, combined with my personality and privilege, dared me to take risks. I now explore fresh paths, leaving behind what no longer serves me. Reflecting on life's fleeting nature drew me to Stephen Levine's "A Year to Live," a book that has informed my life for many years. Loss uncovers the door to profound reflection. Levine provides a year-long process that has supported me in living each year as if it were my last. He asks questions like, "If you were going to die in a year, what would you do? Who would you be? What would you complete? What would remain undone? What would begin?" This leads me to ponder: How am I utilizing this one precious life? I sense that complacency arises from our ability to adapt and our collective denial of death in Western culture.

It's not just death that can shake up our approach to life. During today's group mentoring call, we explored deeply challenging moments and health crisi that can awaken us, reshaping how we live. While studying compassionate inquiry, a somatic counseling approach to trauma taught by Dr. Gabor Mate, I came across the work of one of his teachers, A H Almas, which goes like this: "Your conflicts, all the difficult things, the problematic situations in your life are not chance or haphazard. They are yours... designed specifically for you by a part of you that loves you more than anything else... It will go to extreme measures to wake you up; it will make you suffer greatly if you don’t listen. What else can it do? That is its purpose."

So here I am, questioning: Am I living with intention? Can I view a challenge as an opportunity to reassess my life? Not from a place of shame or frantic busyness, but from a longing to live deeply, not shallowly. To pursue meaning and direction while shedding the weight of proving anything. Yet, if I had only three years left, how would I choose to spend them?

Many of us are living at such a pace that we don't have time or space to reflect on these questions. Retreat can offer us that space, held in a group and away from our worldly commitments. If you are ready to pause, reflect, and reconnect with what truly matters, I invite you to join my upcoming The Way of the Goddess Retreat in North Bali, from November 1st to 7th. We'll walk alongside the energy of the Devī in her four magnificent forms:

• Lakṣmī – the nurturer. You are already whole. Śrī flows from being, not doing. In retreat, we learn the art of receiving.

• Sarasvatī – your voice is sacred; creativity is a prayer. Nāda, the primal sound, pours forth from within you.

• Durgā – embodying the nurturing mother and steadfast protector.

• Kālī – the liberator. Let go. Her sword of truth severs what must end, allowing the soul to blossom anew, incinerating what no longer nourishes you.

Join us this November in Bali for The Way of the Goddess Retreat. A sacred pause. A conscious return. It's time to reflect alongside Kālī, Lakṣmī, Sarasvatī, and Durgā. Come seek the deeper questions within. This retreat isn't about becoming someone new; it's about returning to your truest self. It's a space to pause, reflect, and realign with what genuinely matters: your values, rhythm, and deeper yes. It's an invitation to ask: What do I wish to begin? What legacy do I want to leave behind?

If these questions resonate with you, you are warmly invited.

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